Little Did I Know . . .

As a young woman I heard a retirees comment on how difficult they found retirement. I bragged that "I will not find it difficult! . . . Believe me when I retire it is going to be easy for me."  I really thought that would be the case.  But, little did I know how deeply ingrained being part of the "labor force" flow within one's veins.  In mid-2010, having had enough of the "trains", enough of the "push, push,push" to get to work on time (which is an aspect of working that I never believed in!; punching a clock is so "over rated" by employers; when my last boss installed the whole hand reading machine [at a highly dangerous height] my remark to him was, "What next?  My first born?"); enough of the drudgery of automated work; enough of office politics; enough of just about everything that was connected with "work"; I called Social Security and asked how much would I get if I retired "now".  It was a do-able amount and with that behind me, I, right then and there, on the phone applied for my Social Security benefits.  Two weeks before the appointed time which I had given to Social Security, I gave notice to my firm.  (Two weeks notice being the accepted industry standard.) I then walked through the firm for the next two weeks and said my good byes to my co-workers.  But, I didn't realize how deep the "work mode" was ingrained in my psyche.  My eyes continued to open each  morning at 6:00 a.m. (which I really didn't mind); I continued to get out of bed and proceed as if I had to get to work on time. (which I did mind); the "push, push, push" was still in full force.  I had to mentally, s l o w myself and not go into "push" mode.  I accomplished that, but it took several weeks, then I noticed that I had a feeling of "guilt" as if I was doing something "wrong" by not working (this was an unbelievable revelation.)  I worked on that and got over it.  Next, there was the "brow beating" at the end of each day, that, I was not accomplishing enough. So I began to keep a "Daily Done List".  This was a fabulous tool, which made me realize that not only was I doing more than I ever did, I was amazed with the amount of things that I was doing.  Now I trust myself, and no longer need to keep a list of what I have done in order to prove to myself that I have done something.  So these were "stages" that I saw myself go through and cleared the hurdles each time.  My advise to anyone who is contemplating "retirement" is to have a "plan of action".  Continue your "schedule", get up early; lose the "push, push, push"; don't fall into the trap of feeling guilty because you are not "punching a clock" for someone else; and, don't let your mind play tricks on you by "brow-beating" yourself into thinking you are not doing enough. It is alright to relax, alter yourself, retrain your brain, do for you for once.